Királyi meghívás

A What a girl wants című aranyos film kapcsán jutott eszembe, hogy rákeressek hogy is hívja meg a királynő az alattvalóit, mert a filmben az Imdb szerint legalábbis, ez hibásan történt. Egyelőre csak a következő érdekes történetet találtam. Sajnos nem tudtam összevetni más meghívásokkal, vagy ellenőrizni hitelességét, mindenesetre így is érdekes szerintem (különösen az, hogy "alattvalók és parasztok" kategóriába van sorolva a meghívott (bár nem tudom, hogy valóban mezőgazdasági munkásról van-e szó):

"To be honest, I was half expecting it to arrive but until the gilt-edged envelope popped thorough my letterbox I couldn’t be sure. However, large as life, there it was - the invitation.

The message was clear and simple: ‘Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II requests the pleasure of your company at the civil marriage and blessing of her eldest son, Charles, HRH The Prince of Wales, to Ms. Camilla Parker Bowles at Windsor Castle at 2pm on April 8th. next.’

When the Prince and Ms. Parker Bowles visited Lismore last year, he made a secret trip to Waterford where I showed him around the city in the dead of night and, at the time, he hinted that there might be an invitation in the post for me before too long. I was only in his company for about two hours but, at the time, I thought he wasn’t a bad old skin despite all that had been said about him.

However, I have decided not to attend the ceremony, not because I wouldn’t like to have a dekko around Windsor Castle and enjoy a bit of a do, but because of the tiresome conditions attached to the invitation which, I suspect, the Prince knows nothing about.

Included with the gilt-edged card was a separate letter signed by Sir John Gigglesworth, Private Secretary to the Prince. Private Secretary to the Prince. It reads as follows:

Dear Mr. O’Connor,

I trust you will be able to accept Her Majesty’s kind invitation and that you are suitably appreciative as only a handful of commoners and peasants like yourself will be present on the Big Day. Your presence at the marriage ceremony is conditional on you agreeing to the following rules and signing a pledge to do so.

You must present yourself clean and tidy and, under no account, must you consume any food in the previous 24 hours that could cause you to break wind. Flatulence is strictly forbidden in the presence of the Royal Family.

Sarcastic remarks, heckling or shouts of ‘Up Princess Diana’, prior to and during the ceremony, will not be permitted and those who attempt to do so will be ejected.

Guests are asked to refrain from using foul and uncouth language and are reminded that only immediate members of the Royal Family and bridal party are permitted to ‘eff and blind’ inside the castle walls.

Instruction on etiquette such as the correct use of knives and forks will be available, prior to the meal, for commoners and peasants from former colonies. It should also be noted that only members of the Royal Family are permitted to place their elbows on the table and eat peas off their knives.

The Royal corgis will, as usual, mingle with the guests. Any person seen kicking one of the Queen’s dogs will be asked to leave.

You are reminded that smoking is not illegal in Britain and any attempt by you to admonish guests for indulging will be severely frowned upon.

Guests are asked not to join in the formal singing during the ceremony and you, in particular, are warned that showband-type harmonies are most definitely out of order.

You are also instructed that, at no time during the day or evening, are you to attempt to get a sing-song going by breaking into ‘The Fields of Athenry’. Even if HRH Princess Anne should start the song, you are not to encourage her by joining in.

Singers will not be permitted to perform with the orchestra during the after-ceremony dancing and you are requested not to bother the bandleader by sending up your name on the back of a cigarette packet.

No close dancing, especially what is euphemistically referred to in Ireland as ‘a good lie-in’, will be allowed until all members of the Royal Family have left the room. This rule especially applies in the unlikely event of any peasant being asked to dance by Her Majesty.

Should the Queen deem fit to address you at any time, it is forbidden to ask her for racing tips in connection with her racehorses and greyhounds.

If the Queen requests the orchestra to play some Scottish melodies, hand-clapping and toe-tapping will be permitted but any attempt to instigate a boisterous ‘Walls of Limerick’ dance will result in ejection from the ballroom. Under no circumstances will ‘slashing’ be permitted during the dancing.

You and other peasants from former colonies are reminded that when attention for the national anthem is called, the band will play ‘God Save the Queen’. Those who attempt to sing any other anthem or shout ‘Up the Republic’ will be removed by security and may be questioned by members of the Special Branch."

Via Irish news, waterford news, current events